Let's be clear on one thing: The last time I attempted to play badminton was in the backyard of the Tell household down the street about 10 years ago. It didn't go well then, and it probably wouldn't go well now. But one thing I was able to do was hit the shuttlecock over the net, maintain a decent rally, and play with some semblance of dignity.

Four years ago, I sat in my room in Los Angeles and contemplated the boatloads of work I had to organize before 7:30 the next morning. It was 2:00 am. Desperate for something to help me stay awake, I flicked on my small, remote-less television and commenced watching live coverage of the Beijing Olympics. What a joy -- the ability to watch live, world-class athletic events at an ungodly hour of the morning, when I was actually determined to stay conscious for at least another two hours.

The Boston Urban Iditarod is a creative take on the traditional Alaskan dog-sled race -- substituting sleds for shopping carts, dog teams for humans (dressed in costume), and tundra check-points for a cross-town pub crawl. While Urban Iditarod competitors can win trophies, prizes, and notoriety -- that all depends on which teams filled their sleds/carts with the most non-perishable donations for the Boston Medical Center food pantry.

^{Source: Flickr via Wikipedia}

The Onward State tweet that erroneously reported Joe Paterno's death Saturday night and led to an avalanche of false reports in other outlets was based on the work of two student reporters: One was snookered by a false email, and one overstated his knowledge of the events, according to the site's co-founder.

Sports radio guy and notorious pants salesman DAMON AMENDOLARA breaks it down: RICK PERRY is the Houston Texans: meaning he has no chance. NEWT GINGRICH? The Baltimore Ravens: a long shot to win, has a shaky reputation, known for making bad decisions in the past. Broncos? That would be the Tebow-ish RICK SANTORUM: preachy, really conservative, and we're all ready for his exit.

We're still trying to figure out what awful thing the good people of western Pennsylvania did to deserve God's wrath, in the form of yet another miraculous Tim Tebow victory last night. (Oh, wait, right: the good people of western Pennsylvania voted for this asshole.) And so now the rest of us in New England have another week of wondering what role destiny has in store for us: are we the Turks sent to crush Tebow's NFL crusade yet again? Or are we just a walk-on Goliath being built up for David's pentultimate magic trick?

Welcome to "Meet the Mayor," a segment in which we interview local Foursquare Mayors in their natural habitats.

Fenway Park
Matthew Goldstein

So, you take pictures of fans and the Park sells them as souvenirs. Has anyone ever made an obscene gesture while you took their picture?

In a town with a history loaded with heroes, legends and giants, paying homage to each deserving demigod is a tall task. In that same town with a horrendous history besmirched with racial conflicts and prejudice practices, it is never to late for redemption. Such is Boston; a city that can hold its head high on its heroes and hide its face from the shame of yesteryear at the same time.

Betting on college hoops isn't merely for sports nuts, columnists, and NCAA referees. It's for the fiscally responsible, too! I mean, someone's gotta win, right? So here is the surefire method to ensure that your ten (or more) dollar buy-in will turn itself into a small (or enormous) fortune.

-Holiness is an awful quality.

ESPN's Chris Fosberg uploads the video: the Green Monster is alive and well in Boston. And no, he's not wearing a Celtics jersey -- he's wearing a UFC t-shirt. Below, from the Hynes Convention Center earlier this afternoon, Shaq takes questions about joining the Big Three and sharing a locker with Big Baby, then gets ground-and-pounded by some little white kid in a Tapout shirt.

Green was the order of the evening last night when football -- the world version -- returned to Fenway Park for the first time in 42 years. Not just because the basepaths had been turfed over as part of the pitch, or because the Green Monster was looking down on the proceedings, but because the two European sides taking part in the contest -- Glasgow's Celtic FC and Lisbon's Sporting Clube de Portugal -- both have green as their predominant team color.

In our tribute to the Red Sox this season, we give you Brave Play, a fictional graphic novel set in 1948 about baseball. But this comic is just a little off the beaten path from most baseball strips -- what do you expect from us? You won't find discussion of stats and reliving of great plays made in years passed here; instead you'll find a historical world where supernatural conspiracy rules the outcome of games.

After much speculation as to why Tiger Woods got into a single-car accident at 2 o'clock in the morning this passed Friday (hitting both a fire hydrant and a tree before his wife smashed in a couple windows with one of his golf clubs and allegedly dragged him outta the car to safety), the veil of secrecy has been lifted, or, rather, yanked off.

1. adamcohen Breaking News: Brett Favre is addicted to attention. Stop feeding it. #enoughalready 05 May 2009 from TweetDeck
2. CapnCrook07 I hope Brett Favre breaks both of his legs in some freak accident just so he has to stay retired. Honestly, fuck you Favre. 05 May 2009 from web