I interrupt this Ask Me Anything Day to bring you 17 completely gratuitous jokes I made on Twitter this year about Lieutenant Governor Tim Murray's late-2011 car crash. (If you aren't familiar with Twitter conventions and hashtags... well, it's not really worth getting into it for this.)
Expect other collections from the year's Twitter archives in coming days.
Murray's driver's license #TossItInTheFilenesPit
January 4 Had to drive like an LG, but made it to Brentwood before Santorum
February 11 "Hey
Lieutenant Governor, can I get a lift from you?"
March 18 Last
minute tip to St. Patrick's Day Breakfast speakers: "Tim Murray"
rhymes with hurry. Also: worry, scurry, blurry, & jury. #mapoli
March 30 Tim
Murray will use the winnings to buy a car elevator -- that locks the
cars in from midnight to 7am. #MAMegaPlans
from the car? #canthelpmyself
@dbernstein just spoke
with LG who asked me to tell you 92 wins; Ellsbury MVP.
April 13 Tim Murray is obviously Dave Edmonds "Crawling From the
April 27 Hey, is "crash course" some kind of 2014 Guv primary
dig? MT @MassAuditor:
Here's a crash course in Auditor Bump's work on tax expenditures
May 2 #OtherMApoliheritagesurprises
A long-lost branch of Tim Murray's family were Italian race-car
May 4 Lieutenant Speed Demon? MT @MakenaCahill:
Hashtag game in honor of the #derby:
Scotto's Half Court Shot
May 23 Can't wait for MassDems convention demolition derby. MT
@globecynthia: US Rep
John Olver unhurt when his car went off road into stream
May 28 I'm doing 107 MPH RIGHT NOW AS I TWEET THIS
May 30 "Hey, want to go survey some storm damage?"
June 1 Chatted
w/ LG Murray. Didn't ask him how long it took him to drive here.
August 8 Aly
Raisman pulled LG Tim Murray from the car at the last moment before
he crashed. #AlyCanDoIt
October 16 The
house Tim Murray was in completely collapsed on top of him. He is
October 26 So...
who wants to play #MAHurricanes?
eg, Hurricane Tim, sweeps through at 100+ mph, damages cars but
leaves people unharmed