Doug Rodrigues, with a big-ass knife, in the kitchen at Clio.

"I'm kind of a live wire," Clio executive chef Doug Rodrigues told the Phoenix earlier this month. "I'm not consistent, and people can’t really read me most of the time. As soon as you think I’m some hard-ass prick, I’ll go soft on you."

Well, clarification: Rodrigues is no longer employed at Clio.

Here's the thing: I'm kind of a secret, Grade-A hermit. Not a hermit in a traditional sense of course, but more of a lounging afficianado. I do booze around and let my proverbial hair down way more than my paycheck allows, yes, but it's this thing where, if you were to hold up my favorite pair of sweats and a free press dinner side-by-side, for one embarassing and shameful minute I will actually consider the sweatpants.