13 Potential Presidential Campaign Slogans Pulled from the Trailer for "Sarah Palin's Alaska"

As the weekend approaches, it's time to stop questioning if Sarah Palin could be America's first “reality show president” (whatever that means), and to gather up the family for a viewing of her wholesome TLC debut. From what we've seen so far, there are big surprises in store for anyone who crowned Nucky Thompson the most avaricious politician in the 9pm Sunday time slot.

Though Boston is not lucky enough to get an advanced screening of Sarah Palin's Alaska, the two-and-a-half-minute trailer includes at least a baker's dozen excerpts that should certainly excite her fans. That's right; despite her exploitative voyage being the first nature show to advertise “No Lobbyists," the program is stuffed with more rancid red meat than Todd Palin's freezer.

It's hard to tell if every phrase out of stupid's mouth has been scripted as an overreaching metaphor, or if she's just incapable of avoiding generic platitudes at every turn. But what is evident in every teaser so far is that Palin's Alaska is about the most political wilderness on planet earth. So without further delay, here are 13 rally cries – pulled from the preview – that her primitive base is likely to feast on:

“It's about family and community, and that's what the Alaskan spirit is and we're proud of it.”

“I would describe myself and my family as just normal, average, everyday Americans.”

“It would be a lot easier to save myself from a crevasse by just not falling in one.”

“That whole misperception about being a diva – it kind of cracks me up.”

“How come we can't ever just be satisfied with tranquility?”

"The anchor is dropped, and a bear's coming towards us."

“I understand the uniqueness of this land.”

“Are you feeling what I'm feeling?'”

“I'd rather be out here being free.”

“There's a gnat stuck to my lips.”

“Mother Nature always wins.”

“Oh my gosh look at this.”

“This is just flippin' fun.”