Domestic violence is so hot right now; DC Housewife takes a whoopin'; orange soda: not just for fascists!

White House crasher/DC Housewife says Whoopi hit her. Whoopi says she just tapped her without being invited. (Atlantic Wire

"Love the Way You Lie" video shows us how domestic violence can actually be sexy and fun! Mel Gibson and Chris Brown: "See?!" (Stereogum

Wyclef Jean: "Ready or Not" for Haitian Presidency? Ex-Fugee, Pras, says not. Haiti will probably agree (HOPEFULLY). (NY Daily News)

Turns out that Fanta, which is apparently huge in Europe, was originally a Nazi beverage. Though, let's be fair, isn't anything "popular" in Europe Nazi-ish? Don't you wanna, wanna, wanna...ethnic cleanse? Too much?? (Slate)

Emma Watson is now a barely legal Mia Farrow. Keep mum around Woody Allen. And satanic cults looking for a baby momma. (Twitter)

Will Ferrell hablar espanol (oh pesky future tense!)? No, really, he hacera...lo? (NY Mag)

Pint-sized bisexual Tila Tequila squashes rumor of having a legitimate career: claims she didn't make a porno. (The Superficial)

Estranged father-daughter duo, Ryan and Tatum O'Neil, set to have reality show documenting their attempts at reconciliation. Rest of the world would rather watch Vanilla Ice watch paint dry. (AV Club)

Naomi Campbell says she thought gift of illegal blood diamonds were some "gross, dirty rocks." Promptly threw them at assistant's head. Which probably would have exposed the diamond, if it weren't for all that blood. (CNN)

 --Marianna Faynshteyn and Alexandra Cavallo

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