Monday Night Football preview: Two teams that should be named the Oilers!

Foot Ballz Talk is a live internet broadcast in which “two guys talk about football during a Monday night and play records.” It is produced by Mac and TD (familiar to fans of the musical endeavors Big Digits and Bodega Girls), and has been described by us (not by them) as “Mystery Pigskin Theater 3000.” Each Monday, we’ll publish the FBT preview of that night’s contest. You can listen to Foot Ballz Talk on the internet, or follow them on Facebook and Twitter.

This week we get the second half of our two-part series, "Teams-that-are-irrelevant-to-the-current-season-but-are-on-TV-because-one-replaced-the-other-in-a-location" (soon be a short pamphlet from City Lights Books). This time starring the one-time Houston Oilers -- the Tennessee Titans -- against the team that would be the Oilers, i.e. the Houston Texans.

Now, I have a great affection for the old Oilers, despite the fact that I am from the Northwest and generally loathe all things Texas. Warren Moon went to Washington and Jerry Glanville was crazy and those uniforms were awesome (would it be too much to ask the two teams tonight to both wear these?) and they were exciting to watch. For some godawful reason neither the team that left Houston nor the one that sprung up in its place chose to keep/resurrect these great unis. Instead, both chose to embrace hideousness: and in that way this game will be dissapointing. Luckily for us there are many other ways this game will be disappointing. That's why you won't have to spend the whole night listening to me tell stories about how I hurt myself trying to do Ernest Givins's electric slide or why I thought Haywood Jeffires was the greatest name in sports history.

No, no, this game offers bum-outs all around: from the subject of the forever-on-the-brink Houston Texans (and that subject's twin offspring, Andre-Johnson-is-awesome-but-always-injured, and Matt-Schaub-seems-like-he should-be-better-than-this); to the lamentable career of Vince Young, tattoo and Patron enthusiast;  to the life of Jeff Fisher's barber (sorry about the Josh McDaniels in that link, Google image search is a cruel mistress). This game will be filled to the brim with wasted talent, unfulfilled promise, and questions about whether LenDale "Chubby Thunder" White could eat an entire turkey in one sitting. (I will be taking the "affirmative, but only if he's baked" position). Also Chris Johnson is very good and he will probably do something amazing. At least it won't be as bad as last week. Join us tonight at 8:30PM EST, just click the link below!

LISTEN: Footballz Talk: Titans vs. Texans [Footballz Talk]