Great Globe Story About Sox Abuse

As one of maybe three people in Boston who thinks that professional sports are ridiculous, I generally keep my mouth shut. In a town where even Ivy League professors and my writing colleagues drop everything to watch grown men in leotards run around grass diamonds, I can't even get away with that "everyone who likes sports is my intellectual inferior" shit that I pull back home in New York, where I'm not a Yankees or a Mets fan, by the way.

But today, in light of Matt Viser's excellent Globe story titled "Hub strikes out on Series revenue," I feel compelled to weigh in. This reminds me of the time I told my father that he shouldn't give a shit if I smoke cigarettes because it doesn't affect him, and he rebutted: "Actually, asshole, it does affect me when all you uninsured bartenders and writers end up in the hospital with lung cancer." Basically, while I deal with Red Sox smoke blowing almost year-round in Boston - and rarely say shit - this time I have the right.

Viser's article is couched in one not-so-phenomenal phenomenon that was uncovered by the Boston Foundation: while Denver made $940,365 during the 2007 playoffs, Boston managed to lose $650,000. How is that possible? Well, as it turns out, the only thing that sucks more than Boston's fiscal relationship with Massachusetts are the City Hall lips wrapped around John Henry's meat. While the Rockies pay for security in Denver, our city picks up the Red Sox tab. And I know that diehards won't find this nearly as infuriating as I do, but Boston also paid $360,000 for the team's victory parade. I would call you all a bunch of suckers, but it looks like I caught this foul ball in the ass too.