Here's a shocker: STEVEN TYLER did not suck at American Idol last night. Believe us -- we were prepared to hate all over this thing. But against all odds, the muppet-faced, gobble-mouthed, injury-prone Aerofrontperson managed to charm the tweets off Twitter (where the for/against was averging somewhere around 10-1, in our estimate) and only made one horribly inappropriate remark that will haunt him for life. Our take: TYLER IDOL FTW! We're still amazed that Tyler managed to utter more coherent sentences in one episode than he's managed in his last decade of press interviews. And while Randy Jackson continues to milk his first and only catchphrase, Tyler whipped off 10 in under two hours. The guy was a total sweetheart -- right up until the moment where he started salivating over the gams on that 16-year-old. But let's face it -- you knew that was coming, right?
In other Tylerannia, the Guardian reports that Tyler auditioned for a Led Zeppelin reunion but was not -- hear this, not! -- rejected by the band, but instead told them that he would absolutely not take Robert Plant's old job, nowaynohow. Presumably Tyler intuited that he'd have many more opportunities to ogle teenage badum-bum while hosting a reality singing competition than he would doing anything that Jimmy Page is involved with.
Finally, we had our first Masshole Idol sighting of the year, as Williamstown, MA's Ashley Sullivan sobbed her way through to Hollywood. We predict an early exit, but a golden ticket beats whatever she won during her 10-week streak of topping the karaoke competition at her local Applebees.