MITT ROMNEY (mid-speech, to enthusiastic knot of supporters in a South Carolina Staples) And as I’ve said before, when I advised King Henry V to use more archers at the battle of Agincourt, thereby ensuring victory, it wasn’t because I wanted to see the French army destroyed by arrows, it was because I’ve been there, I know what it’s like to be outnumbered, marching toward Calais, I know —
GLEN JOHNSON, ASSOCIATED PRESS That’s not true, governor.
ROMNEY What’s that?
JOHNSON I said, that’s not true. You never advised King Henry V to use more archers.
ROMNEY Glen, listen to me, I’m not going to debate this with you. It’s a matter of public record that in 1415, on the eve of the Battle of Agincourt, King Henry V and I had a consultation, the outcome of which was that he decided to use some more longbowmen. That’s a fact!
JOHNSON Governor, it is not a fact. I don’t know what it is. It might be a dream you had.
ROMNEY Well, whatever construction you choose to put on them, Glen, ha ha, the facts are quite clear in this case. He said, “Governor Romney, I’m concerned that the French cavalry will have a decisive effect on tomorrow’s engagement.” And I told him —
JOHNSON Governor, I was with you last week in Michigan when you said that you also advised King Leonidas at the Battle of Thermopylae.
ROMNEY Glen, I never said I advised King Leonidas. I never said that.
JOHNSON But last week you —
ROMNEY What I did there was simply point out that, if he put the Spartans into that mountain pass, he could maybe hold up the armies of Xerxes for a day or two, buy himself some time. That’s all.
(Enter Romney press secretary Eric Fehrnstrom, wearing chain mail and swinging a mace.)
FEHRNSTROM Don’t be argumentative with the candidate.
JOHNSON What, I can’t ask him a question?
FEHRNSTROM You’re being argumentative with the candidate. Don’t be argumentative with the candidate.
(Flattens Johnson with mace. Romney supporters cheer.)