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Sex and videotape

Dr. Lovemonkey
By DR. LOVEMONKEY  |  August 6, 2008

Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I am a 25-year-old woman who’s been seeing this guy for a month. The relationship has been excellent up until now. A few days ago, I saw videos on his computer that showed him having sex with a number of different women. I don’t want to believe that he recorded and kept these videos. It is horrible to see someone who I like so much having sex with some other girls. I can’t stop thinking about it.  What should I do? A friend told me I should get over it, since everyone has their own past, and surely I can’t find a virgin male at this age anymore.
_A.L.D.

Dear A.L.D.,
There are a couple of issues here, one worth looking into, although the other is rather innocuous. The innocuous issue is connected to what your friend said. Everybody does have a past. It’s not really alarming that someone who (I assume) is in his mid-20s or older has been sexually active. However, the videotaping of the sexual escapades could be a matter of concern. This is something you should ask him about. If his response makes sense, don’t be rash about breaking it off.

Cold comfort
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
I was recently getting an ice cream cone with my seven-year-old son, and a woman asked me if he was my grandson. I was utterly flabbergasted! I am 33 years old, in very good shape, and I have never been asked this before. Am I kidding myself, or is there something wrong with people?
_Janie

Dear Janie,
I suspect that you came across a stupid and thoughtless person. Yes, these people are out there — basically people with atrocious judgment. The bad judgment isn’t so much how they assume that you are a grandparent (just like someone might see a woman who is a bit overweight and ask if she’s pregnant). Rather, it is how they callously and thoughtlessly blurt their quips out to anyone within ear shot. These people are out there, and they are legion.

That's a stretch
Dear Dr. Lovemonkey,
For many years, I have had difficulty dealing with pizza with stringy cheese. I’m sure you are familiar with this: the cheese is hanging, stretching, and it becomes quite unmanageable. I came up with the idea to bring a pair of scissors with me whenever I would be consuming pizza. I even bought a pair specifically for this purpose. I am concerned about the first time when I bring the scissors with me to a pizza parlor. I fear the other diners will take it as odd or weird if they see me wielding scissors while eating pizza. Is there a way to avoid their stares or to make them accept an innovative way of eating pizza?
_Eddie Jones

Dear Eddie (if that is indeed your name),
I do not believe there is a way to avoid staring by other diners. You can “make them accept” your use of scissors by leaping up and threatening to rip their throats open, but this will also put you in jeopardy of being arrested and going to prison.
   
Send questions and romantic quandaries to
rudycheeks@verizon.net.

  Topics: Dr Love Monkey , Culture and Lifestyle , Relationships , Sexuality
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