Director Allen Coulter bites off more than he can chew in a rote romantic drama that finds Twilight's Robert Pattinson trading his fangs for James Dean's cool. As Tyler Hawkins, he nails the pretty-boy aura sure to please female fans, but he scotches the finer details, like smoking a cigarette in a convincing way.
Worse, he exhibits little chemistry with Lost's Emilie de Ravin, who plays Ally Craig, daughter of the New York cop (Chris Cooper) who arrests Tyler just days before the couple's first dinner date, at which Ally announces: "I prefer my dessert first. I just don't see the point in waiting."
Had Coulter dished up Remember Me's dessert at the outset, revealing the pseudo-poignant, jaw-dropping twist (which helps explain the unwise participation of veterans Cooper, Pierce Brosnan, and Lena Olin), he'd have enabled viewers to skip a distasteful meal that Pattinson's partisans might mistake for profundity.