In the church of bubble bath

Here's the story: she was 19! innocent! unassuming! didn't know WHO to trust! But she also wanted to maybe, be in Playboy! Oh Audrina, what a silly soul!

And more importantly, what will Lauren think? That orange cowboy hat is hideous.

Locally posted NSFW pics here. Those faces.

On the eve of Juno, WE tries to shock us with horror-REAL-LIFE-high-school stories, documented by single mother and corporate marketer Sharon Liese.

Among the usual OMG!/WTF!-yes-high-schoolers-do-give-blow-jobs banter, there are some less titillating and more REAL moments: brain tumors, abortion, and what I can only think to call "underage marriage" to a young man in the military.

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

THE POP CUTLURE APOCOLYPSE: A Britney Spears/Heidi Montag duet just premiered on Ryan Seacrest's talk show. The song is called "Dramatic" and may be part of a forthcoming Britney Spears - Duets album — BUT it sounds more like a solo from someone, breathlessly, trying to be Britney Spears.