My friends and I have a running game called “Shoney,” in which one person says something that is dangerously false, and insists upon the point until other people get annoyed by the instigator’s ignorance. Then, right when people start screaming “Busta Rhymes and LeAnn Rimes are not related, you moron,” the joker shouts “Shoney,” and everybody else feels dumb for getting worked up over the ruse.

Thank Satan that those scum-sucking liberals run Hollywood. If creative feats were left to righties, then there might be more flicks like An American Carol, which I saw last night. You might ask why I would endure such pain – especially since The Phoenix already reviewed the unanimously (although conspiratorially) panned conservative comedy.