Meet the Mayor: Bad Ass Couch of Titanic Badassery

Welcome to "Meet the Mayor," a segment in which we interview local Foursquare Mayors in their natural habitats.

Our Bad Ass Couch of Titanic Badassery
Maria "Masha" Gutarov

Out of all the mayors we've interviewed, you're the first to feed us. Why haven't they all done that?
‘Cuz they're cruel, cruel people. Are you going to record me? That instantly adds pressure.

You're opposed to pressure?
I don't know. I'm Russian, so I should able to handle pressure, as well as high-tech spying devices such as what you're using.

What's so badass about this couch?
We hang out on it. We're badass.

What makes you people badass?
We just are. We're cool. We watch things. We talk. We're human.

Where did you obtain this couch?

Were you concerned the couch might be ridden with STDs?
No. We used sprays from AutoZone that I'm pretty sure kill everything. I mean, they're for cars. You know the things that happen in cars, like "parking."

 . . . When you leave your car somewhere?
No, there is a second term from the ‘50s. Kids would "park," and often serial killers would kill them.

What did they call it when they just wanted to leave their cars someplace?
That's parking as well, but this is "parking" with bunny quotes, where people "park" and, I hear, do very naughty things.

Want to be interviewed about your Foursquare mayorship? Give us a shout: tweet @bostonphoenix or email And for tips, friend us:

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